My soon to be 4 year old, stubborn, strong willed son has been “potty training” for what seems like forever. We tried a reward system, we tried convincing him he was a big boy and he didn’t need to wear diapers anymore, we tried the 3 days without diapers….twice. Nothing seemed to be working.
He would tell us things like, “I’m not ready” or “It’s hard for me”. We would validate his concerns and ask him why he wasn’t ready or why it was hard. His answer was his favorite answer when he does not have a real reason, “It’s why mommy”. (I still am not completely sure what that means.) When we did the reward system he would only go potty when he knew we had prizes and when the prizes ran out, he suddenly ran out of pee pee for the potty. Oh, my little smarty pants was totally working us.
I was devastated that nothing seemed to work and he could not stay consistent with the potty training. I would call my mom and ask for advice. She would assure me that it was okay, some kids take longer to potty train. I wasn’t satisfied with that answer after hearing it time and time again. (I should have trusted her, she is my mom you know.) So, I did what every mom does. I googled it. Why isn’t my toddler potty training? Potty training a stubborn toddler. The lists goes on and on. Then I admitted it to myself that yes, I do have a strong willed son and a resistant potty trainer.
After all my google research, I decided to lay off the potty training and see what would happen. I waited and then waited some more. Then, last Monday my son woke up and said “I don’t want to wear these diapers anymore!”. I had not had one sip of my morning coffee yet, so I was still trying to process what he had said with so much excitement. I responded with “Okay, so what would you like to wear today?”. He said, “big boy undies!”. I was celebrating and doing a happy dance in my head. He wore his big boy undies and he has been wearing big boy undies for three days straight!
He got mad on the first night when we put a diaper on him for night time. We though he might wet the bed and he proved us wrong. He popped out of bed, ran to the potty, and changed back in to his big boy undies. The thing that he did seem to have a fear about was doing #2 in the potty and he was successful with that too! Can I tell you what kind of excitement and glow we both had after that success! We were both on top of the world! We made some fun cupcakes in celebration of his potty success. If you would of told me a few years ago that I would be baking cupcakes to celebrate poop in a potty, I would of laughed! Motherhood can make us do some inexplicable things.
So, after all of our ups and downs with potty training I have come to a conclusion. If you are like me and struggling to potty training your toddler, don’t feel bad. Don’t doubt yourself as a parent and don’t doubt that little one either. The amazing thing about being a parent is you learn so much along the way. With this potty training adventure I have learned that sometimes you have to stretch your patience even farther then you thought possible but it pays off in the end. I learned a lot about my little guy too. I learned how strong willed he is and it always amazes me how smart he is. I’m not mad at him for potty training on his terms. Somethings take longer to adapt too. I don’t ever want him to lose that stubborn streak or strong will because that might just help him get through challenges in life. The last lesson I learned throughout our potty training adventures is always listen to your mother!